Death by Perp
by rebelrsr
Summary: Maggie gets in over her head on an undercover operation, and Alex decides she's had enough.


Alex's fingers ached. She didn't dare move them from the rifle, though.

"_I can take them out before they even know I'm there._" Kara's voice was an angry buzz through the comm in Alex's ear. Tight with more worry and fear than Supergirl displayed during most missions.

This wasn't most missions. Alex had to blink back the tears that blinded her line of sight into the warehouse. "We wait for backup," she responded. She wanted to turn Kara loose on the gang members in the warehouse. Burned with the need to simply open fire to save the undercover officer with them.

She could feel Kara's frustration through the comm. If NCPD and Trap One didn't arrive soon, Alex wouldn't be able to keep Kara from blasting the warehouse into rubble. Part of her wanted to give the command now. "_**Alex! **__We can't wait. I can…they're…_"

Kara broke off, and Alex lost her battle with tears. She could see Maggie from her vantage point. She knew what Kara hadn't been able to say. All of the work. The deals for information. It might all be for nothing. Toggling her comm to the official DEO channel, Alex contact Vasquez. "I need an ETA."

"Trap One is three minutes out. They have NCPD SWAT with them, ma'am."

Three minutes. Alex glanced into the warehouse. "Understood." Alex had already started a mental countdown. "Standby." She switched back to Kara. "You heard?"

"_We don't have three minutes!_ _I can barely hear her heart, Alex!_" The tenor of Kara's urgency changed. Alex was used to her sister's impulsive nature. Fear drove Kara now.

Fear for Maggie. A fear Alex fought tooth and nail. Maggie was undercover. She had known the risks. Through the scope of her rifle, she saw one of the men raise a handgun and press the barrel to Maggie's temple. Her finger moved automatically.

Alex heard the shot a split second after the man holding the gun dropped to the ground. He didn't get up. "Get Maggie!" The command was pointless. Maggie disappeared from the warehouse before Alex started to speak. One by one, Alex took aim at the men she could see through the small, broken window.

Most had scattered or ducked behind cover.

Return fire skittered along the concrete ledge bracing Alex's rifle. She dropped flat for a moment before detaching the bipod from the barrel and rolling to her feet. Concrete chips rained as Alex sprinted along the rooftop. "Kara?" She slung the rifle across her back.

"_We're almost to the DEO. She's alive, Alex." _Alex heard the unspoken "for now".

"Stay with her. I'll coordinate the attack from here." Clambering over the far side of the roof, Alex gripped the rungs of a maintenance ladder, glad she wore gloves as she set her boots and slid toward the ground.

Alex severed her connection with Kara the minute she hit the ground. "The target's en route," she announced. "Have Med Bay standing by."

"_Yes, ma'am_." Vasquez, always the voice of calm and reason. "_Trap One arriving now_."

"I see them" A string of headlights lit up the dark cluster of buildings around her. "Notify NCPD their officer is clear and send them the footage I recorded." Slipping out of the shadows, Alex flagged down the first vehicle. "Warrants?"

"Signed, sealed, and delivered to my email two minutes ago." Lucy cocked an eyebrow as Alex squeezed onto into the cab before the Humvee took off again. "Did Kara…?"

Not this time. "I gave the order." She didn't back away from possibly blowing the NCPD case. "I fired the shot."

"Easy enough to argue exigent circumstances." Lucy gripped Alex's leg for a second before both jumped from the vehicle. Time to finish the fight.

* * *

"Dan..vers?" Maggie's voice was hoarse and hesitant. "Where?"

Reaching for a cup of ice chips, Alex took a deep breath against the knot in her throat. "DEO Med Bay. Here." She held out a spoonful of ice. Her hand shook and most of them slipped off and onto Maggie's hospital gown. She kept her expression blank, though. It wasn't her place to say any of the things bottled inside.

For several minutes, Alex fed Maggie more ice. Listened to Maggie breathe and the monitors beep. All sounds that should have convinced Alex that Maggie would be fine. Except each breath pushed Alex closer and closer to an emotional cliff. "You almost died."

Maggie laughed – and then gasped. The heart rate monitor kicked into high gear; the beeps an annoying and frightening wail. "I didn't. Super…Supergirl to the rescue."

The sheer scorn in that statement shoved Alex into the chasm. Her hands fisted around the blanket covering Maggie. "They had a gun to your head, Sawyer! Maybe you don't give a damn anymore. You were working that op without approval. Without even letting your captain know your cover'd been blown!"

Alex's voice hung in the room. And damned if Maggie didn't simply shrug. "Not your concern, Danvers. I wasn't working a DEO-related case."

"Fuck you!" The words tore from Alex, shaking her to her soul. "I love you! That didn't stop when you left, Maggie. I don't…I don't know if it will _ever _stop." She turned away and wrapped her arms around her stomach. Trying to hold in all the raging emotions. She couldn't lash out at Maggie. Alex was the one responsible for everything.

"If you need anything, Doc Hamilton's in the lab. Press the button by your right hand. Or just yell. Kara's here." Alex trudged to the door. "In case you decide to give a shit, you're going to be fine with a lot of rest and time off."

She was almost out of the room when Maggie's voice called her back. "This isn't your fault, Alex."

Right. It hadn't been Alex who'd thrown away the woman she loved over a dream she wasn't even sure she wanted any more. "Get some rest." If they started this conversation, Alex might not be able to put all her pieces back together again. She wasn't sure all of them were in place from the day Maggie had walked out of her life.

At her request.

"I can't move on," Maggie said. "I tried. Bars. Clubs. NCU women's basketball games."

Pulled around against her will, Alex stared at Maggie – who met her gaze with grim determination in every line of her body. "Apparently, you're a hard act to follow, Danvers."

Alex understood the sentiment. She gotten so desperate to forget Maggie that she'd let Lucy _and _Kara set her up with blind dates. It didn't excuse what had happened at the warehouse. Or any of the other reckless things Alex had heard about through the grapevine. No one spoke directly to her. They knew Maggie was a sore point. But people still talked, and Alex was an expert at sussing out information.

"You have to stop, Maggie." Alex returned to the bedside and sank into the folding chair. "I never meant for this to happen," she whispered. "We were so happy, even if the engagement was too much, too soon. And now I can't walk into a bar or a restaurant without expecting to see you there with me."

"It's not your call."

The room shimmered as Alex lost the battle with tears. "It's not." She'd have to live with the pain of that regret. "I'm not saying this as your ex-fiancé or the woman who loves you." She swiped a hand over her face. "I'm begging you as a friend, as a fellow law enforcement agent, as some woman you bumped into on a street." Her voice rose, and Alex pressed her lips together for a minute.

"No more leading the charge on every fugitive recovery raid. No more following leads without taking backup." Alex gripped her resolve with both hands, staring at Maggie's mutinous expression. "No more courting death by perp every time you leave the station."

The body beneath the blanket shook.

Alex surged forward, holding Maggie as best she could, given the tubes and wires and healing places. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Maggie." Her own shoulders heaved with the sobs Alex managed to stifle.

Fingers brushed against Alex's hair. "So…so am I. I should have stayed. Should have fought…for us."

Hope, fragile, amazing, life-sustaining hope raised its head. Alex leaned into Maggie's fingers without giving in and begging Maggie for forgiveness and another chance at a relationship.

"Going to push the button now, babe." The words were slow but distinct. "Be here when I wake up?"

Alex turned her head and pressed a tender kiss to Maggie's hand. "No place I'd rather be."


End file.
